Eight (Sarcastic) Reasons to Take the Public Inter-Village Buses in Coastal Colombia

1. You will gain deep insight into local culture.  In fact, you can watch the entire life cycle of couple’s relationship — meeting, courtship, marriage, first baby, the inevitable descent into nagging and stony silence — as the bus crawls sllloooowwwly past.
2. You can complete all of the primary research required for a PhD dissertation on coastal Colombian botany before reaching your destination.
3. You save money on dental work later after losing your teeth jouncing on spring-less seats.
4. You can invent new yoga poses trying to cram your frame into the insufficient seat space.  Bonus: you will never again complain about the legroom on budget airlines.
5. You will become expert at the full spectrum of screeching noises created by shifting without a transmission.  And the wide variation in horn tones.  Also, the broad definition of items considered “luggage,” including — and I’m not exaggerating here — an entire bed frame and bathtub-sized bucket of sardines.
6. You can make millions* organizing a gambling pool on the recurring games of chicken that the bus driver plays with oncoming semis.
7. You get to figure out how to use toilets like these.

8. And wonder how cars like this — with neither door nor seatbelt to hold in this Croc-clad little child — are allowed to cruise the streets.

*Millions of Colombian pesos, of course, which aren’t worth a whole lot.